Salsa City Forum » News and Chat » Dating and Salsa

On the subject of dating and salsa, I just stumbled across a website for ‘dance dating’ which in fact is advertised of the front page of this website.

Looks interesting! Details can be found here: Dance Dating.

Hi guys, thanks for the replies.

After I saw the dancing in the movie I didn’t get angry or yell at her, I think I’ve been quite calm. Just a bit... confused. I guess I was wrong to be hurt though.

I would love to try and make the effort with this salsa. I have two left feet, don’t really enjoy dancing, and prefer a quiet pub to a nightclub... but I would obviously be willing to learn to dance for my girlfriend. How awkward would it be for someone as clueless as me to learn? Are there always going to be beginners in every dance class, or will everybody else in the room be amazing?

Cheers again
Dave

Hi Dave,

It’s good hear that you’re willing to give a go for your girlfriend. I’m sure she will appreciate it.

Beginners classes always start from scratch, with the basic steps. You will probably need to do about 5 or 6 beginners classes until you move to the next level which is improvers. However it is important to still continue with the beginners classes to ensure that your basic steps eventually become second nature to you.

If you go to classes where there are different levels, don’t be put off if you see more experience dancers, and think I’ll never be able to do that, but instead use it as your inspiration.

It does take time to learn, but as long as you come away from each class having learnt something new or think that your able to do a particular move more smoothly than before, then you will feel a sense of achievement. The key thing is make sure you practice after the classes or at home with your girlfriend, which will enable you to build up a memory of what you have learnt.

Good luck, have fun!

I’ve taken a look at the movie, and if anyone is thinking of getting it in the hope of seeing some good dancing: don’t bother. There’s only a minute or so of dancing, which is used as a plot point to freak out a non-dancing boyfriend similarly to the way Dave has been freaked out. The sexy dancing that so disquieted Dave isn’t even salsa, it’s bolero. Believe me, Dave, you’re very unlikely to see anything like that in any UK salsa club.

Why do films do salsa so badly? Has anyone here been unfortunate enough to see ‘Mad about Mambo’, which is actually about ballroom samba?

My soon to be husband and I met at salsa - he was fab and I was just learning. This did cause some problems in the beginning in that he was dancing with all these fab ladies and I was often left in the corner feeling totally deflated - and a little bit jealous!

Now however, that’s not the case at all and I often go dancing without him. After being together for so long, we now both understand that we are two individual personalities who happen to enjoy the same hobby. We just remember that our relationship is always more important than salsa, which is designed for FUN!!! There are many couples out there who could do with that reminder!!

HI - felt I had to repond to this thread! I am a very happily married lady who also loves to salsa - my husband does not share this particular passion of mine. I have met many super people through salsa and have a wide circle of both female and male friends. I go on nights out, weekenders and salsa holidays - without my husband. I have a great time and my husband is happy for me to do so. We do not feel that we have to share every interest together and I actually feel it is important and healthy for us to have seperate interests - my husband realises that I “need” to dance, and does not worry that I am spending so much time in the company of other men - with a husband like mine why would I be interested in another man - maybe if he was more possessive and curbed my enjoyment I would be more likely to stray! When 2 people marry - you are still 2 individuals. I do however repect and admire those salsa couples who have got it right - who take pleasure in their partner’s enjoyment with salsa!

Hi HML, First of all I’m happy for you that you share such a great relationship with your partner. But I have a question for you. O fcourse this question is directed at any woman in a steady relationship that goes out for salsa without their boyfriend/spouse. Have you ever been very attracted to a partner at a dance floor? It may be just for those 3 min. But have you felt a wave of passion for any other man (other than your husband)? I’m asking because my girlfriend has just started salsa 2 moths ago. Much like Dave, I saw my first salsa video and was a little winded. I have to admit I would be a little jealous if another man could raise my girlfriends pulse like that. Please comment, I’m trying hard not to feel this little bit of insecurity... so any encouraging words would be appreciated.

Hi Matt, at the end of the day, trust is the most important thing in a relationship. Do you trust your girlfriend? It is a matter of fact that sooner or later her pulse will race because someone (a man) is dancing with her and she is enjoying it. Women, in my experience, need this. Do not try and take it away, that’s when things turn sour. If salsa is not your thing, fine, but let your girlfriend have her outlet for fun, which is the main thing to get out of salsa, fun.

Your girlfriend, I’m sure, finds lots of other things about you attractive and hence why she is with you. Support and nourish her interest in salsa and she will stay a very happy bunny. Remember, music nourishes the soul and dancing shows how happy your soul is. This happiness will reflect back on you too and so everyone is a winner.

Very true Stellan.

Matt, it’s very natural to feel the way you are doing but like Stellan said, trust is the most important thing.

This may not help at all but I know certainly there are some guys I dance with who really get my pulses racing and it can be very passionate but I also know that it’s first and foremost the dance and being caught up in the moment of that dance that evokes that reaction. Secondly, I also know that when that does happen, the only person I want to find when I come off that dance floor is my man.

But at the end of the day, it’s still not nice watching your other half get up close and personal with someone else. We are all only human after all. :)