Salsa City Forum » Salsa Music and Dance » Learning Salsa

I was at O’Neill’s on Monday night, and found nearly all the ladies were leading me.

Lyndahedges, if you want men to be able to lead, after the lessons invite them to dance. They then have to lead and appreciate how to. Ideally ask men to dance with you at their first lesson, so they don’t get complacent about leading. If you do this you will end up with loads of men who can lead. If you don’t you will spend every Monday night complaining about how poor the leaders were at O’Neill’s.

Hmm. There's a workshop on leading and following in Roath this very Satuday, is there not? I'm going. I don't know if it's booked up yet or not but the details are currently here.

I try very, very hard not to backlead when I'm dancing. Leading or following is I think harder than footwork, harder than anything else you learn to start with.

I never lead, that's the mens job to do. I'm not sayin all of the men don't lead as most of them do but u get the odd 1 or 2 who don't know what to do on sum of the moves. Don't get me wrong, I mess up as well when I'm there.

Hi Folks,

This weekends workshops (Spinning & Leading/Following) are full up. So unless you have booked please don't turn up on the off chance.

If you have missed out don't panic, we will be running more workshops in the future. :)

If there is anything you would particularly like a workshop on let me know and I'll see if I can run it.

So, Bob, who r u when ur at O'Neill's? U can't count me in as 1 of the women who leads, as I don't. If I knew who u was I could tell u whether ur 1 of the 1s who r good at it, as there r a few there who r very good at it.

Hey Bob - I was also at Salsa at O'Neill's on Monday, and I certainly wasn't leading you - if we danced together that is! May I also point out that there are many men who don't ask the more experienced female dancers to dance - why this is I have no idea, and as a consequence, I sit there on my butt most of the night - however, if you did ask, then maybe you would get to dance with a woman who lets you lead! Just a suggestion!

After the classes I only tend to dance with ladies I danced with during the classes. I have had a chance to talk to them and have some idea of my chance of rejection. I once asked a lady who was so good she didn't need to go to the classes for a dance, and she looked so bored doing the limited number of moves I know that I gave up half way through. Once bitten, twice shy.

Ah I see Bob! Thanks for clarifying the issue!
I understand what you sre saying, but I have always been taught right from the word go that it is EXCEPTIONALLY rude to reject a mans offer to dance - unless you are resting and agree to dance the next available dance with him. In which case, I wish more men would have the guts to ask experienced women to dance - we don't care if you can only do a cross body lead and a ladies turn - we just want to dance (That's my opinion anyway!).
I apologise for all the experienced women who make you guys feel otherwise!

Hey bob, I do dance with men after the classes and I find sum of them good with the leading. I've only been doin this for 6 wks so I ain't at the stage where I think I can do the lead, so it's not me that leads in the class. If I knew who u was, u'd find that out.

Hey BtheB I was at Oxford the other week, ‘anticipated’ a move and the guy nicely took me into the move he wasn’t planning, but quickly got us on basics and explained to me what he was doing and we tried again successfully. He also asked me to tell him how he was doing and if I wanted to try any moves, he would lead them if I told him in advance. This worked very well. On your other point of being refused, I have never refused anyone a dance and don’t know anyone who has either... Except once where the guy was a total sleazeball. Hopefully your not one of these!? Seems strange that you would suss out your chances of rejection before asking though! Sounds more spongebobsquarepants to me!!!